90

23 May

90 days ago I told myself I would no longer use pain medication. Today marks day 90 of being clean. Something I am proud of.

Weird thing when I got home. My father asked me if I had any pain killers as my brother was in pain. Now my father knows about my addiction, but doesn’t “get it”. I say something like I have a headache and he tells me to take a vicoden or percocet. So I stopped sharing with him about my journey. The part I am not happy to admit is that I did have a stash of pain killers and so I threw him a bottle and said “here”. My sweet friend tells me it is not uncommon to have a stash even when trying to get clean, I felt a bit less like an idiot. Still not the brightest. I have others stashed places and I know in my heart I just need to discard them. One day.

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